whats your jobbie?

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gunbladelad
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by gunbladelad » Sat Apr 16, 2016 11:26 am

First post in this topic for me. Usually I go once or twice a day when I've got a routine going (for example when I'm working) - usually once before work (even if I'm not particularly "needing" I'll go empty what's there) - and usually at some point after work between dinner & bedtime.

I will be honest, if I've been out drinking though, there does tend to be a few more the next day - extra smelly and quite nippy to boot. It's probably a sign I shouldn't be out drinking, but what the heck - it took me long enough to start drinking, I'm not gonna stop just yet - and it's not as if I ever over-do things.
Where logic won't work, I will

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aztecca
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by aztecca » Fri May 06, 2016 2:32 pm

Major bum gravy today.Like turning on a tap up my hole.Ring is stinging.
SH1T HAPPENS :wink:

AceGrace
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by AceGrace » Fri May 06, 2016 4:54 pm

I was just out in the back garden and noticed my dog eating her freshly laid dog eggs.

I chased her, she dropped the poo and I trod in it.

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aztecca
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by aztecca » Fri May 06, 2016 8:57 pm

AceGrace wrote:I was just out in the back garden and noticed my dog eating her freshly laid dog eggs.

I chased her, she dropped the poo and I trod in it.

Shame you never got that on camera would have been a guaranteed £250.
SH1T HAPPENS :wink:

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aztecca
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by aztecca » Thu May 12, 2016 7:44 pm

Lovely smooth dump today. Just slipped out like a brown silk covered sausage. Beautiful.
SH1T HAPPENS :wink:

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silvergunner
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by silvergunner » Fri May 13, 2016 7:25 am

The darkest brown I have ever seen come out my bum. Looked like id used a piping bag :shock: :lol:

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Liamh1982
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by Liamh1982 » Fri May 13, 2016 4:00 pm

I've got a new game - buy something with the orange reduced stickers on it from the Co-op and wonder if you'll end up with explosive diarrhoea or not. Odds are 50/50.

I call it Rectum Roulette.

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Liamh1982
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by Liamh1982 » Sat May 14, 2016 6:28 am

Disappointingly average - what's the point of having sashimi packs if you're not gonna use raw fish? Where's the jeopardy?

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JazzFunk
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by JazzFunk » Sat May 14, 2016 11:11 am

The peristalsis is pumpin' right now. I'll report back in 5/10 to let you all know what emerges from my arsepipe. :wink:

(What a fookin thread)

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JazzFunk
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by JazzFunk » Sat May 14, 2016 11:18 am

Right. Kicked off as a Solid Snake, then transmogrified into five or six foamy squigglers. Filled the bog. Two bottles of red last night gave it a greeny-black hue, and two bags of Marmite peanuts gave it its density. Seven thorough wipes left my bumpipe all Kim and Aggie. Feel light-headed now.

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aztecca
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by aztecca » Sat May 14, 2016 3:02 pm

Red wine and marmite nuts was never going to have a happy ending.

Im determined to have a kebab tonight not had one in ages.Will report on its outcome tomorrow. I'm off fishing at 5 am so there may be a bit of al fresco jobbie laying tomorrow.
SH1T HAPPENS :wink:

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JazzFunk
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by JazzFunk » Sat May 14, 2016 5:29 pm

I think it's coming back for a second round, got crazy borborygmus going on right now and I'm scared to fart in case I get an unexpected delivery. I expect the next one to have a slightly paler complexion than this early aft's.

Saturday night is takie and Polish lager night so I'm assuming I'll be birthing some floaty, beige abominations come tomorrow afty. Haven't had a 'smooth cigar' one in eons, the classic 'one-wipe' jobbie. I miss them.

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DPrinny
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by DPrinny » Sat May 14, 2016 5:43 pm

Image

She dont know what "Leave me alone im having a s**t" means

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Sega2006
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by Sega2006 » Sat May 14, 2016 8:18 pm

Today solid yet dam near unwipeable, I swear I must have gone through a forest's worth of toilet paper.
Watching you sleep since 1990

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JazzFunk
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Re: whats your jobbie?

Post by JazzFunk » Sat May 14, 2016 8:26 pm

^I bet your anus is weeping reddy-brown tears after all that paper-chafage. :shock:

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