ET phone Retro Gamer

Want to air your opinions on the latest issue of Retro Gamer? Step inside...

Moderators: mknott, NickThorpe, lcarlson, Darran@Retro Gamer, MMohammed

User avatar
Loftgroover
Posts: 1295
Joined: Tue Nov 13, 2007 12:27 am
Location: birmingham
Contact:

Post by Loftgroover » Tue Nov 13, 2007 12:16 pm

mikeb wrote:
Take this for example, another film license.

Image

Looks like some kind of oddly fetishistic gardening simulator. But no, it's actually The Texas Chainsaw Massacre by Wizard Video Games.

Actually about as scary as a wet weekend in Eastbourne.
I dunno...I'm quite scared by a crazed gardener with a huge knobbly green penis....

User avatar
merman
Posts: 6475
Joined: Wed Nov 30, 2005 5:14 pm
Location: Skegness, UK
Contact:

Post by merman » Tue Nov 13, 2007 12:37 pm

felgekarp wrote:
merman wrote:As Howard Scott Warshaw points out in the latest issue of gamesTM (Retro section), ET still sold a million copies...
How many got returned though?
That's AFTER returns have been deducted, according to the article...
merman1974 on Steam, Xbox Live, Twitter and YouTube

User avatar
Stuart@retrogamer
Posts: 276
Joined: Wed Aug 15, 2007 10:36 am
Location: Bournemouth

Post by Stuart@retrogamer » Tue Nov 13, 2007 1:05 pm

merman wrote:As Howard Scott Warshaw points out in the latest issue of gamesTM (Retro section), ET still sold a million copies...
I'm no movie expert, but I'm sure ET shifted more than a million copies - on VHS sales alone :wink:

User avatar
andrew_rollings
Posts: 311
Joined: Thu Nov 09, 2006 10:24 am
Contact:

Post by andrew_rollings » Tue Nov 13, 2007 1:32 pm

mikeb wrote:
Take this for example, another film license.

Image

That's the C64 version then, right Merman??? ;)

Andrew
Last edited by andrew_rollings on Wed Nov 14, 2007 9:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.

User avatar
Frank Chickens
Posts: 926
Joined: Thu Dec 08, 2005 7:04 pm
Location: Brummieland

Post by Frank Chickens » Tue Nov 13, 2007 2:19 pm

I'm reading Retro Shamer a lot as it's always interesting to pick the bones of a bad game and delve into the reason why. Will the next one be World Cup Carnival or The Great Space Race as they both deserve and good going over, especially the latter.
"A cynic is what an optimist calls a realist"

User avatar
merman
Posts: 6475
Joined: Wed Nov 30, 2005 5:14 pm
Location: Skegness, UK
Contact:

Post by merman » Tue Nov 13, 2007 5:59 pm

andrew_rollings wrote: That's the C64 version then, right Merman??? ;)

Andrew
Wiseguy :P
merman1974 on Steam, Xbox Live, Twitter and YouTube

User avatar
Ritchardo mkII
Posts: 107
Joined: Thu Dec 15, 2005 4:00 pm

Post by Ritchardo mkII » Thu Nov 15, 2007 4:42 pm

I like Retro Shamer - reminds me of the old skool mag reviews that would crop up from time to time when a mag would really let rip (and undoubtedly lose out on some heavy marketing cash). It's funny but some of those have stayed with me far longer than the many, many positive reviews...

The Rise of the Robots piece highlighted in last month's RG is a fine example with some fabulous imagery. Another favourite was AA's trial of Count Duckula 2.

The games publishers were undoubtedly taking the p!ss with some of the games they were releasing, nice to see the mag publishers doing the same back...


On a similar vein, I'd like to see a few more articles along these lines - a regular Don't Believe the Hype section were a much praised game from yester-year gets panned (fairly or unfairly depending on reviewer bias) could be enjoyable...
Am I Not online? Try: www.cpczone.net

User avatar
bigfreakypossum
Posts: 278
Joined: Sat Sep 15, 2007 7:07 am
Location: Tulsa, Oklahoma, USA

Post by bigfreakypossum » Sun Nov 18, 2007 4:58 am

merman wrote:(And from a historical point of view, I don't think it DESERVES the title of worst game ever. I've played worst, and indeed HSW did some nifty tricks with the 2600 hardware.)
Indeed. I think it's really cool that the static field in Yar's is actually generated from the game's code.
One toot on this whistle will send you to a far away land!

User avatar
Darran@Retro Gamer
Posts: 6761
Joined: Fri Nov 25, 2005 11:34 am
Location: Bournemouth
Contact:

Post by Darran@Retro Gamer » Sun Nov 18, 2007 6:29 am

We're going to be visting Street Gang Football soon. It's a truly dire piece of crap that has even the computer A.I. refusing to play it (no really).
Image

User avatar
Dudley
Posts: 8705
Joined: Sat Dec 10, 2005 7:53 pm
Contact:

Post by Dudley » Sun Nov 18, 2007 10:30 am

I'd suggest International Rugby Challenge and Kick Off 96, but you'd be better just posting the text of The Rev's reviews of same.

http://worldofstuart.excellentcontent.c ... /rugby.htm

http://worldofstuart.excellentcontent.c ... p/ko96.htm
Yesterzine - The Literal Magazine Show
http://yesterzine.co.uk | @Yesterzine on Twitter | yesterzineshow@gmail.com

User avatar
yethboth
Posts: 2077
Joined: Sat Feb 24, 2007 7:51 am

Post by yethboth » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:47 pm

What other games does everyone think should also be in Retro Shamer?

I've got a few:

1. The Crow: City Of Angels on PS1
2. The Empire Fights Back on Speccy
3. Friday the 13th on Speccy
4. Digital Pinball on Sega Saturn


Anyone else got anymore examples that should be in Retro Shamer?

User avatar
JetSetWilly
Posts: 9535
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2006 5:57 pm
Location: We Must Perform A Quirkafleeg!
Contact:

Post by JetSetWilly » Tue Nov 20, 2007 9:46 pm

Predator on the Speccy
oh, come on!! its just pure crap!!! i was sucked into the marketing ploy when i was 7 after watching the film, which was cracking, and realized i wasted £2.99 on something which coded by a monkey held hostage by Steve Martin.
same as Return of the Jedi, again on the spectrum. Completed it 7 times in fifteen minutes.....so bored i wanted to mince my head and serve it in a bolognase!!!!!
JSW's Guff Emporium! <- My bit of t'internet.
IronMaidenRule wrote:I want to be a mighty warrior that can give people Vajjazles with a swing of his mighty sword, and also replenish health with communal Merkins!....I would like to be called....Norman!

User avatar
pottyboy
Posts: 1767
Joined: Sun Feb 05, 2006 4:03 pm
Contact:

Post by pottyboy » Wed Nov 21, 2007 10:49 am

How about Akira on the Amiga? The movie is one of the greatest anmated films ever made, but the Amiga version is something else...
Image

"And I've got a little TIP for you. Get the POINT?" - Guybrush Threepwood

User avatar
yethboth
Posts: 2077
Joined: Sat Feb 24, 2007 7:51 am

Post by yethboth » Wed Nov 21, 2007 1:10 pm

pottyboy wrote:How about Akira on the Amiga? The movie is one of the greatest anmated films ever made, but the Amiga version is something else...

Agreed, RG should feature Akira on the Amiga as their next Retro Shamer game.

User avatar
Gordon Bennett
Posts: 73
Joined: Sun Dec 02, 2007 9:22 pm
Location: London

Post by Gordon Bennett » Sun Dec 02, 2007 10:39 pm

I would go with Plumbers Don't wear Ties for the 3DO.

Yes, it is rare. It's also obscure, even for a 3DO exclusive title. It's also awful.

It's barely a game at all, it's just a choose-your-own-adventure dating sim with still photos and badly recorded voiceovers. The few drawn graphics in the game are by far the worst on the system. Or any system.

The game is slow, dull, and seems to go on forever before actually allowing any choices. The characters are boring, and the voice acting is terrible. It's everything you can think of that has been said to criticise interactive movies, only taken to an entirely new level.

I actually *love* interactive movies, but even I'll admit this one is awful.

There are only two small saving graces about this game. One, after suffering through the first few eternities of the game, it becomes obvious that the developers didn't even bother pretending to take the game at all seriously. They go beyond taking the censored, it becomes almost surreal at times.

Two, for all its faults, it's still far better than Hardline or A fork in the Tale on the PC.

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests